What a season. I just read writing helps bring relief and I remembered I could write, not claiming it to be good, but I can put thoughts on paper. So can you, so go write if you feel led. It is very therapeutic.
So...Merry Christmas. The banshees were so fun to watch. I was reminded again of the holiness of Christmas Eve and the beauty of Christmas carols and the magic of children's eyes full of wonder. What a gift to see, hear and smell this season. It's truely a gift that I so often take for granted. It was a sweet, treasured day yesterday.
So, why do I need relief? Well, it's been a winter season in some ways and spring in a lot. I'm still feeling the winter season, so it's a little too fresh to describe what this season has been like the past six months. Last night I laid in bed and scrolled through john 8-10. I read about Jesus being the light in the dark. Judgement. Forgiveness. The story of Lazarus and how Jesus waited until all hope was gone, until the people had no more power, so HE could burst forth and bring Lazarus back from the dead in all HIS glory. All HIS glory. That's my prayer.
My story is not my own, I just hope to share my experience, strength and hope and most importantly Jesus. How I want to write the story myself and how I cling to figuring things out. If I can understand them...then. God is mysterious. All I know if he is refining me. He is making my fear into faith. He is taking my power away and I believe it is so he can burst forth like noonday. The winter will melt and streams will roll. Psalm 147. Satan is under our feet and Christ has come to bring us peace, restoration, redemption and renewal. Renewal is my word for 2015. Jesus renew our weary souls with you!!
Renewing souls and giving hope. Out of our Second Story studio that is what my friend is doing by leading al anon meetings at noon on tues. A small group of women huddle in a circle and share their experiences and bear one another burdens. A 12 step community is scary to step into, but a beautiful thing. It's one of the holiest places and where Jesus, for me, has been the most tangible. We named it second story because he has given us second stories and continues to redeem those as well. Proclaiming his name and word through-out the day, reaching out to trusted women who are able to shoulder life's load with you and whispered prayers of surrender throughout the day....THAT, for me, is the key to living an engaged life of active surrender in community, in Christ. I'm a firm believer that in this world we will have struggles, BUT that he has overcome. He HAS overcome...even death. What amazing news and what better news to tell yourself when you have trouble. Turn your eyes upon Jesus, look FULL in his wonderful face...then everything else will grow dim. It will. It can.
Many blessings to you this season. I pray God fills us all with joy and a Christmas miracle of changing us from the inside out. It's never a done deal and I pray he frees me everyday from whatever new idol I think will fill me up. Only he can and he will!
Xoxo.
Below are pictures. Social media can be satan in disguise and the lies creep up, "they've got it together". Behind every smile are tears, fear, sorrow and joy. Battles of victory AND defeat. Let that be ringing in your head when you feel a prick or jealousy or comparison with others pictures...that is a joy robber and "ain't nobody got time for THAT". Life is complex, so pictures make me happy.
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